When I kill myself if anyone who fucked me over shows up at my funeral or cries and claims they cared about me I swear I’ll come back and flick a chair at them
order a pizza and when the delivery guy shows up act confused and ask whos it for, and when the delivery guy says your name just say “adam?….. adam doesnt live here anymore. he died exactly 10 years ago after he ordered a pizza. is this some kind of sick joke?” start crying, take the pizza and close the door before they even get a chance to ask you for the money. you now have a free pizza. congratulations.